Birdemic

Heralded by many as the new Best Worst Movie, James Nguyen’s um… romantic thriller… is nothing short of a non-stop cinematic disaster. Words truly fail when it comes to trying to describe Nguyen’s calamity.
Birdemic is follows a young couple through their early days of courtship, only to inexplicably throw them into the middle of an avian attack. The story is really that simple with the occasional “Global Warming will kill us all” threat, which is never as subtle as you suspect this third time director intended. But then that would imply Nguyen had some talent, or any, or employed talent, or was possibly even aware at all of what talent might look like were it to fly into his face and explode, like his CGI birds do. CGI in this case meaning copying and pasting the same three frames of a bird floating and filling the sky with them… until they make dive bombing sounds and explode, this is a literal translation of the threat that these birds pose. It’s scary.
But Best Worst Movie? That invokes Troll 2, and I think we all know what a marvelous disaster that was, if you don’t, I suggest you stop playing video games for 90 minutes and wallow in the shocking terror that is Troll 2.
Is this on par with such greats as The Room, Blood Feast or even Plan 9 from Outer Space?
Sadly, despite it’s car crash nature and genuinely horrible technical elements, and trust me referring to anything in this film as technical is an insult to a pencil, it’s missing the naive charms of the aforementioned.
Sure when you watch Blood Feast or Troll 2 you honestly wonder how anyone could have thought they were making a great film, but there’s a charm and a level of appreciation in their craft work, it might be misguided or quite possible even broken, but it’s there.
Birdemic: Shock and Terror is missing that, acting so terrible that you are reading the lines off your hand is different from terrible to the point of being unable to walk down the street naturally.
That said, any fan of bad cinema should not miss the chance to catch the up and coming movie genius that is James Nguyen introduce Birdemic at it’s UK premire this Friday, 28th May at the Curzon Soho. This film really must be watched with beer, in a roomful of people.

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